And the answer is….

So you’ve finally reached that point. You’ve turned every corner, reached every dead-end and have finally realized that you’re spinning out of control. You need help. And we’re not talking about “Climb up three stairs on a broken leg, while lugging a piano on your bad back” kind help. No, we’re simply talking about the “Stay up with me. Keep me company. Let me know that I’m not alone.” kind of help. So, with tears in your eyes and a quiet desperation you lay bare your soul and say that while you know it’s unfair, while you know they need sleep, could they please stay up and keep you company? And then you wait. You wait for the answer. Will they realize what it means to you? Is it true that once you’ve reached rock bottom, your friends/family will rally around you and help to lift you up? So finally the answer comes…

No.

The answer was no. So here I am. I come with nothing and no one. Yes I have family. Yes I have friends. But apparently there is a limit. I’ve found that limit and with tears in my eyes I realize that I cannot survive with this limit. And that shall be the introduction to this blog. It will be a blog started in desperation.

And I will show you something different from either / Your shadow at morning striding behind you /  Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you; / I will show you fear in a handful of dust.

T.S. Elliot

 

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